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hi there! my name is natalie, but on the internet i go by nat or nana. i'm 21 yrs. old. i enjoy little things like this, making pages and sites, a place that feels like my own. though i have made carrds in the past and may or may not have some still up under other urls... this new project feels even more exciting and special!i first fell in love with webdev when i first started a carrd in 2020, i was automatically super invested in making the "best possible" carrd i could make, and looking back now, they were pretty bad lol. but as the years passed, i've started to reach new heights in carrd making, unlocking greater possibilities than i ever imagined. carrd in itself is a pretty limiting application, with very few tools to create a full-fleshed website. but i am making do with the tools i have, and since i am not yet comfy with coding, i will not be going into neocities anytime soon. but i draw massive inspo from neocities blogs and sites.
i'd like to mention one site that greatly inspired me, a cute digital space created by a user who goes by pooftie.
their site has since closed, but i loved how so comfy and cozy their site was; and the existence of that site has really inspired me in the ways i stylize my own digital space!
i have so much planned for this site but feel like i execute everything so slowly T_T., i hope i can do things quicker as i keep going!i'm sort of a perfectionist, so sometimes things will be changed or scrapped entirely.all in all, i want this page to be an ongoing expression of my thoughts, findings, and creativity. this site is really for myself to look at, but i hope that along the way, you enjoy stopping by as well!~if you want to leave a msg before heading out, you can under my mailbox!
and please be kind!
i can spend hours on working on websites and not get bored. i think overall i have a pretty bad hyper fixation problem, for me hobbies can become addictive. maybe it's because i desperately want an outlet for myself, and making websites and profiles is a super fun and easy way for that. i think i enjoy it more than playing video games. it is my favorite alone-time activity.
i love the horror genre, though i am completely terrified when it comes to horror games.
i enjoy watching horror movies and others play horror games. some of my favorite horror films are barbarian, evil dead rise, and last night in soho.my love for the horror genre bleeds into my hobbies as well, as i enjoy collecting cute + horror figurines mostly, typically small scale and intricate ones!i have slowed down on collecting after the novelty wore off, but plan to continue again in the future...along with figurines, i collect squishies (the foam ones, not the ugly jelly ones) and other small trinkets.
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my top three cuisines are probably chinese (kind of has to be one cus i am chinese), japanese, and thai. though i am always down to try new cuisine and dishes. i am not very picky when it comes to food, i just know what foods i don't enjoy.
i used to draw a lot growing up but grew out of it, i draw sometimes and am still decent. i no longer have a passion for it, so i live through others art and admire their work!
i don't go by a distinct gamertag or alias; i use diferent users on every platform.
(to stay mysterious ofc.)
i recently got my first ever pc (thank you to my wonderful, amazing boyfriend, Solomon), because of this, a whole entire world of possibilities has opened up to me.
i can finally play games i couldn't run before, and have recently started playing silent hill (1), a franchise i have always been interested in + kept up with, so im really excited about that!
since this is my own personal site talking about my life, my interests, and my loves, it would only be make sense to have a whole page dedicated to someone i love more very much. this page is for my boyfriend, Solomon. you are the sweetest soul. i want you to know just how much your presence has impacted me. years ago i could barely envision myself growing old and becoming an actual adult, but now i can literally see us growing old together. it’s so weird, but im strangely excited. i’m also certain that we can make it. ldr hasn’t been kind to us (honestly it’s actually never kind to anyone lol), but im hopeful we will be able to get a place together in the future and close the distance. i’m really content in knowing that we will always have each other, and i hope i can show up for you when you need me most.
i will never get tired of eating with you and just being around you. sleep calling with you helps me fall asleep because you make me feel safe, just knowing you're there is enough for me to feel more at ease. your assurances and encouragement helps me continue with tasks that otherwise probably wouldn't get done. i feel like i can be the weirdest, cringiest, and quite frankly saddest version of myself and you wouldn't ever make me feel bad for it. because i know you love me and i'm your baby, your silly gooby. i hope that stays true forever.
not everyone is fortunate enough to find someone for them, but we found each other in oceans of people, and for that i truly feel so lucky, i know i say it to you often, but i don't think you truly know how lucky i am to have you. i'm actually typing this while we are on call together, and you're playing mc while im working on this site. i'm thankful and really relieved you don't make me feel silly or dumb for spending so much time on this carrd, and that you like to look through it and let me know u like my work. i feel truly loved and seen in these moments. i feel like i miss the mark when it comes to making you feel seen and heard, so i expect nothing less than you to let me know when that happens and for me to do my best to correct it, like you have many times for me. i really appreciate that from you, i will never forget how cathartic and relieving it felt to cry and hold onto you, knowing you were really listening to my concerns and my pain.
i don't really know where i'm going with this long winded letter, and maybe i'm just getting really emotional, (because i love you but also because motion picture soundtrack by cigarettes after sex is playing right now but i hope you know how much i love you, am grateful for you, and wish you could see yourself through my eyes and feel how you make me feel. ok i'm gonna stop before i start sobbing.love, nat
august 13th, 2026
this is where i'll be yapping the mostway more to come...
aug. 14th, i was exhausted all day today. i was called in to work way earlier than planned and i had to conversate a lot with customers. i tried staying positive and for most of the shift/day i was, but towards the end i knew i was feeling sad. there's just a lot of unresolved feelings i have had and continue to affect me. i'm hoping since it's the weekend tmrw and i don't have work, i will feel better.
nana's shrines
i got the nifty idea of shrines from neocities, i think it’s a really cool way to show my interest and love for characters and media.
my first shrine is going to be of the character totoro, from the film my neighbor totoro. i believe it was one of the first if not the first studio ghibli film i ever watched. i’ve always had a soft spot for the character that i hold dear. my love for him has gotten a little louder this year!
majority of my shrines will be dedicated to characters from my childhood. which, i feel like makes a lot of sense. i feel that sentimental value and nostalgia are big drivers for hobbies, media, and characters that we enjoy in adulthood, as they bring on that feeling of childhood joy and whimsy. i'm really glad i was exposed to sailor moon really young, as she and all the other sailor scouts were just really cool to me, the transformation scenes will always give me chills. and while i feel the fight scenes and structures of the episodes are often repetitive and boring (sorry), i still enjoy the messages of the anime, and the designs of the characters are just undeated.i'm elated to share that i have been fortunate enough to have a boyfriend that looks exactly like one of my childhood crushes, tuxedo mask, mamoru chiba. hehe. he says he doesn't see it but he's got his nice hair and gentle, caring, and often smart ass-y charm down.i believe this so heavily that i opted to do a couple halloween costume last year as the pair; but decided on a simpler costume in the end, a honey bee and jar o' honey. still cute, but tuxedo mask x sailor moon will happen.
